I’m Out

Today I am coming out:

That’s right.

Thanks to “people”  such as the NAACP’s Rachael Dolezal, and Goldsmiths Student Union’s Bahar Mustafa – I now know my true identity.

diversityRachael Dolezal

I now identify as a black, one eyed, pregnant, trans-gendered, trans-financial, trans-skinny, Credo Fluid, lesbian stuck in the body of a fat, hairy, and ugly biker.

My pronouns are ZIP, BOP, and YIPEEEEEEEE!

If you dare suggest any of this is bullshit – then you are oppressing me.  Really you are – Social Justice advocacy says so.

I am Black because we are all Black. I am also black because a professor said I can be <LINK>. We all come from Africa apparently (regardless of studies that say Caucasus) and since race is a societal construct according to social justice and the British University College Union <LINK>, regardless of studies that upset the lefties with those pesky racist facts, and even more so the same sort of people who disallow people from celebrating their culture (if they’re White, Caucasian, Aryan) – well that means we are all the same and since we all have our heritage in Africa – I identify as black. yes I can’t dance for shit, or even jump very high  for that matter but that leads me directly onto the next point – I am also clearly disabled.

This clearly affirms that I do NOT have any White Privilege. I can’t possibly have white separatist views, cant possibly be a fascist (I’m black after all), and I cant possibly be xenophobic. so the leftist narrative that thinks everything that disagrees with it is literally Hitler – yeah it can go fuck itself because none of it applies to me.

I am One Eyed/Partially blind/Sight Impaired,  because of the available light spectrum I can only see a small percentage of it. Thus I am also effectively blind and therefore severely disabled (Can’t dance, jump, or see). Do you feel sorry for me yet?

I’m jumping on the trans gendered bandwagon because everybody is and cases of body dismorphia have jumped from less than 0.1% of the population to over 7% in some areas. Now there are so many iterations of the above I must be at least one of them if not more. I havent shaved in a while so that probably makes me a furry too. It doesn’t matter that there are people out there who are genuinely trans-gendered and actually have to go through a hell of a lot in their lives in bloody heroic fashion – I am determined to be a victim and that’s how its done apparently. And Nuh-Uh people – you cant tell me I’m wrong because that’s OPPRESSION, and you wouldn’t want me to invoke Godwin’s law now would you?

I have also discovered I am Trans-financial. I am a millionaire (my aspirations are very humble – some people have it worse, they are Billionaires)  stuck in the body of some poor bastard without a pot to piss in.  I deserve to be recognised for it so it. I deserve a hand out, and a Samsung Galaxy 10 and a EU Grant, and a bursary, and a scholarship and lots of benefits because reasons.  If you say otherwise you’re a fascist oppressor and you smell of cheese.

I’m Trans-skinny. The industrial military complex has forced me to become a materialist and addicted me to finer foods, wine and other things that have made me plus-size. This is insidious oppression, in a skinny size-zero person trying desperately to get out of the body of this fat, hairy and ugly biker. Now yes I know: Healthy at any size, yes I am well aware of this social justice reality – but alas diabetes, shitty physical fitness, and heart disease are just so unfair, probably products of Fascism, or Patriarchy, or the Tories or something just so long as I can blame something else,  so I am clearly being oppressed. Have you any idea what its like NOT being objectified purely for my ripped abs because I don’t look like a Calvin Klein Ad?

I am credo fluid because actually YES – Religion IS a societal construct and as Ghandhi said: “Yes I am, I am also a Muslim, a Christian, a Buddhist, and a Jew…………” – so if he can say it – so can I. If I wish to make serious critique of Muslims – I will – just like all the Muslim reformists do – as a Muslim. If I want to have a crack at Catholic Priests shagging children – I can do AS a Catholic.  ……………………..and you can’t call it racist…………..because that would signify that you assign religions to a specific demographic and that would be blasphemy, and make you an actual racist.

Last of all I am clearly a Lesbian like a great many male bikers I know who have embraced the divine feminine within and instead of cleaving to the bro-mance brotherhood of the mean, brutish, meat eating, phallocentric, war mongering gang culture of patriarchy have recognised that they do in fact just fancy women – that way – If you say otherwise then you are oppressing me and probably have Heterophobic tendencies that need to be seen to.

So as stated – I’m out. Thank you social justice because without you leftie, poncy, vegan, labour voting Pedo-pandering, terrorist supporting, jew hating pre-totalitarian liberals that go ape-shit when ever you meet anyone with opposing views or people armed with those pesky facts – I couldn’t come out against oppression and be just me.

Some evil, wicked, mean and nasty people would just call me some cis-WASP-Fat-Fuck.  That’s because they don’t see the REAL me. <sniff>

Thanks Social Justice – you’re ACE!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: